What's a pair of jet skis (with fluids) and a trailer weight anyways? I've got a pair of snowmobiles that weight about 600lbs/each [wet] and an aluminum trailer. I'd estimate their combined weight just shy of 2000lbs. A pair of jet skis and a trailer wouldn't be too far off that.
In short, none of the vehicles you listed would be a safe choice to pull that load. Do yourself a favor and either buy or rent (Hertz usually has Rangers for $20/day) something that can tow if you plan on using public roads. There's way too many bad things that can happen to yourself or others when asking a vehicle to perform beyond its capabilities.
Good luck, maybe sell that CRX and grab a cheap, little work truck? You'll find its uses are endless once you've got one.
