Tony, I've sat back this whole time and never really said anything. But I think that from being a divorcee myself, I am somewhat qualified, to put my $0.02c in on your situation.
You are truly to good for Lori, and it seems like she refuses to accept responsibility for walking out on you and hopping into bed with another man, and a married man at that!
You have to ask yourself - do you REALLY want her back? I mean putting aside the children for a second, could you look into her eyes again and feel the love you had for her when you proposed to her way back when? I know I couldn't. How could you ever be intimate with her again and not resent her for what she did?
My ex tried to get me to take her back in the 11th hour of our divorce proceedings, but I knew she had been sleeping with another guy (and a tool at that). Just the thought of her giving herself to someone else while we were still married sickened me and I stood firm and told her "NO WAY!"
In the end it was obvious that we were not meant to be with one another, because if her eyes wandered so easily before, it would surely happen again, and I was not going to let myself suffer those consequences EVER again.
Tony, take you daughter and move on. Forget your cheating spouse, she is not worthy of you - regardless of how you may have withdrawn yourself from her prior to her leaving.
The fact of the matter is that you did not stray, she did. And in my eyes, she's tainted because of that.
Be strong and know that there are many of us here that feel for you and have you in our prayers.
