Originally posted by DrGonzo:
Sorry to hear your problems...

You say you are willing to "come clean". I don't understand what you have done wrong, other that to be consummed by daily trials and stress. Who isn't from time to time? Are you leaving something out or am I missing something? Not to imply what someone else here did with indescretions.





No, I'm not leaving anything out, I was just a selfish, uncaring bastard.

Originally posted by DrGonzo:


I find the comment that she won't go to worship trobuling. Are you of different faiths? Or just different denominations? I should clarify that. Being raised a Southern Baptist, I damn near see Catholicism as a different faith. Has this been a root of your problems? The differnences in churches is the big reason i search faith on my own, I know it can be a divisive issue between people. May God give you both wisdom.





We were in different places in our walk of faith. She was/is a new Christian whose growth I've now helped stunt, and I was the "experienced" Christian who knows better than to do what I did. Yes, I was worshiping as a Southern Baptist while she was a recovering Catholic attending a non-denominational church. (I did hear the pastor of that church was arrested etc. I hope that is NOT true for her sake as she may be going there today.)

When we first married, I was still an instructor. It was/is a great job, and I miss it from time to time. One of the biggest things I liked about it was I got to be the center of attention. But I travelled a lot, and she expressed that she wanted me home more, so I became an SSE for Sun which I like, but it certainly doesn't fufill me like being an instructor did.

Well, combine less job satisfaction, an 18 month old child that gets a lot of attention, and a mom who only sees the child everyday (she was off work then) and you have the beginnings of trouble.

I just never made her feel special. While I've always felt she was special, I never made the effort to demonstrate this.
Originally posted by DrGonzo:

There's a lot of info missing here, not that it's anyone's business, but I think that communication, the lack of, is the issue. I will tell you this, a seperation will NOT solve that. You need a professional third party. If you take this to a minister, please be sure they are educated. I have nothing against ministers without an education, but those with a degree in the mininstry usually have some training in consueling.

Good luck to you, man.





I agree, and I do hope that I'm not going to screw this up. Since I fix things (and that's why I'm up, I have a service call scheduled at MasterCard this morning) I simply want to fix this, NOW!!!

She definately wants something else. I just want her to see that she does NOT have to leave to get the peace and pleasure she desires.

I cannot make her happy, but I can work very hard at building an environment where she does feel important and loved, but not smothered and trapped.

Thanks guys, I slept clear through to the 3:15 alarm this AM.

TB

"Seems like our society is more interested in turning each successive generation into cookie-cutter wankers than anything else." -- Jato 8/24/2004