If you came to a point of asking such questions that does my life make any sense, try to make other people happy... help anyone, make a good day for your parents, friends, strangers on the street... just anyone...
When you see that you make people happier, when you see them smiling, you'll feel much better... you need love as anyone needs it, just you need it badly at this moment, and love is such a thing that the more you give away, the more you have.
Don't lock up with yourself.
Tiv
