Originally posted by Jon500a:
I'll keep my advice short as possible as this is a longggggggggggg thread. I have have never lost a lover before, but I have lost some of those I love, one to suicide. Let me tell you something Bad Apple, IT HURTS! Depression can be an ugly thing. You may not care about yourself, but what should stop you as those who love you. This include: parents, friends, relatives, co-workers, your contour, etc. If you hold out, later you will be glad that you didn't do it, trust me, I speak from experience. Talk to a psychologist, they are very helpful. At the risk of being flamed here, pray about it and ask God for help. I can't give you much advice as to how to cope, but when I am down, I try to stay very busy. Do fun things or find projects that need doing to keep my mind off. If I just sit there and sulk it gets much worse. I am sure you will find true love, but it wont' come when you expect it to. Good luck in dealing with your situation. Maybe it would cheer you up to go for a nice (slow) cruise in your car. Best of wishes. Sorry the post ran longer than I thought.
This is good advice. Another thing I often do is let my imagination run wild. I do the same as you when I'm frustrated, Bad Apple: daydream about taking the car on the highway, going to 90, turning the steering wheel HARD and pulling the e-brake (to execute a flip or at least hit the rock cliffs). The thing, however, is I let my imagination go further. I see the cops and ambulance; I see my parents pulling up in the family van and running over, red from crying. My imagination goes further, even to my funeral, - depending on how angry I feel at the moment - and by seeing exactly how much people would miss me (and what good things they'd say about me on the pulpit
) allows me to pull through whatever is holding be back or causing the depression. Thinking about what good they might find in me also uplifts me sometimes; it's like reviewing my own good qualities. Sorry to be so detailed/personal here; but these thoughts (the "after the fact" thoughts) actually help me to cope. Sometimes I cry myself just thinking about how sad everyone would be for me (I'm almost teary-eyed now; I've never actually written this stuff out before)
but what should stop you as those who love you.
Precisely my feeling...
