the starter solenoid is bolted to the side of the starter.
you cant see it in that picture.
it is what the wires for the starter are attached to.

did you try whacking the starter while your wife turns the key?
seemd like you have a straigt shot at it to hit it pretty good.

if you hit it and it tries to start then yo uknow its defintly the starter.

wish i could coe down and help you.
i wouldnt be able to try and come down until at least saturday, and i couldnt make any promises.

NY State Trooper: So what makes your car so special to have SVT all over it? Me: Er...It was made by Fords SPECIAL Vehicle Team?