Originally posted by JReebs96sport:
Fellow CEGers,

My fiance and I have been engaged for about 9 months since graduation day from high school.




My problem is this. You got engaged on your graduation day from High School? I've seen that about 1000x over in bad teen movies.

You are at a cross-roads and are about to embark on the rest of your life. If you want to be with this girl, then keep dating, don't just get married. I've said this to many of my friends: the biggest mistake someone entering college can make is being in a relationship. Why? Because it limits your ability to grow as an individual. You need to develop yourself and figure out who you are, and not have to worry about pissing someone else off or getting jealous.

That said, you may be in a relationship that offers some opportunity to grow individually. But its not as much growth as you would experience if you were on your own. However, if it's like any high school relationships I've seen, I doubt it. Or, you are the type of person who has to be in a relationship and marriage is your way of locking-in on your co-dependency. This can also back-fire, because the wife might get suffocated and leave.

I'm 27 and engaged. At no point in my previous 26 years did I even remotely feel that I was ready to be engaged. Everyone is different, but not that different. Only now am I ready to take the leap, roll the dice, whatever, but it's an easy risk to take because my fiance and I know who we are both in our relationship and on our own.

Finally, relationships take work. When you date around, you get to a point that you don't want to work something out, so you move on. Do you really know that this is the person that you want to work out every issue and not move on? It takes a crazy level of communication. I thought I communicated well with past girlfriends, but I had no idea what communication was compared to what I have now.

Side note: my mom has been grilling me making sure I know what I'm doing. You need someone in your ear making sure you consider all the angles. I don't care what society is like or how mature you are, at 19, you don't have all the angles figured out. You may think you do, but you don't

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