I mod my cars the way I like them and use those mods when I can.
Try not to on the local roads to much, but I'll admit I do occasionally.
Go to autox once a month. Travel to the mountains whenever I can to have fun up there. If I had more money/free time, I'd do it even more.
I know the kinda guys you're talking about that don't really use what they've done to their cars, but don't really know any personally. Everyone I know autoxs or drag races almost religiously.
