you're drunk when...
you move into your newly built home...wake up in the middle of the night having to pee really bad...run out the back bedroom door & squat in the yard, nearly falling over planting your hands on the ground, sink ankle deep in the cold, wet mud (no grass yet)...& the shock of the cold, wet mud on your bare hands & feet wakes you up enough to realize, in mid-stream, that your plumbing was finished the week before...boy did that ever suck
