|
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 7,392
Addicted CEG\'er
|
OP
Addicted CEG\'er
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 7,392 |
i love me some corny jokes!! i'll start.... a horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "hey, why the long face?" 
02 Mustang GT... Tuned by Nelsons. Low 12's, anyone? 
.....______
___|______\_____
|/-\_________/-\_|
.\_/...............\_/
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 21,653
I have no life
|
|
I have no life
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 21,653 |
Two guys walk into a bar.
The third one ducks.
98.5 SVT
91 Escort GT (almost sold)
96 ATX Zetec (i brake to watch you swerve)
FS: SVT rear sway bar
WTB: Very cheap beater
CEG Dragon Run - October 13-15
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 3,738
Hard-core CEG\'er
|
|
Hard-core CEG\'er
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 3,738 |
Originally posted by MxRacerCam:
i love me some corny jokes!! i'll start....
a horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "hey, why the long face?"
and then Mr. Kerry said, I am not a horse.
one ear of corn sees another ear of corn juggling and says, "hey, that's a-maize-ing!"
...you asked for corny jokes 
~Andrew
2001 VW Jetta Wolfsburg Edition
20 valves of fury
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 3,195
Hard-core CEG\'er
|
|
Hard-core CEG\'er
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 3,195 |
Well then...why can't you tell corn a secret?
it has ears...
The doorbell rings and a guy answers his front door and finds a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and tosses it out into the yard.
Two years later, the doorbell rings and the man answers the door and there is the same snail. And the snail says, "Now, what was that about?!"
1999 Sportage 4x4...don't go there, it was free
....______o_o
.../_l l__\____\
..|--l l__----[]\|/[]
.....................oo
=( )_)----( )_)--)_)
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 759
Veteran CEG\'er
|
|
Veteran CEG\'er
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 759 |
How do you kill 75 blondes in a submarine at once?
You knock on the door!
Or you run the diesel generators underwater for 18 minutes with your 02 vents closed filling the compartments with C0 - but I think the door part was better.
E0 #4384 of 6535
Born Jan. 9 1998
My SVT from the ashes
147,466 miles, purchased Nov. 2002 @ 76,559 miles
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 21,653
I have no life
|
|
I have no life
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 21,653 |
Originally posted by SVZETEC:
Well then...why can't you tell corn a secret?
it has ears...
huh? so do humans.
98.5 SVT
91 Escort GT (almost sold)
96 ATX Zetec (i brake to watch you swerve)
FS: SVT rear sway bar
WTB: Very cheap beater
CEG Dragon Run - October 13-15
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 3,195
Hard-core CEG\'er
|
|
Hard-core CEG\'er
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 3,195 |
Hey...it was one of the first hits for googling "corny jokes" 
1999 Sportage 4x4...don't go there, it was free
....______o_o
.../_l l__\____\
..|--l l__----[]\|/[]
.....................oo
=( )_)----( )_)--)_)
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 6,198
Hard-core CEG'er
|
|
Hard-core CEG'er
Joined: Apr 2002
Posts: 6,198 |
Not really a 'corny' joke, but funny nonetheless...
WHY YOU NEVER QUESTION A DRUNK
A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected: A half-gallon
of 2% milk, A carton of eggs, A quart of orange juice, A head of romaine
lettuce, A 2 lb. can of coffee, And a 1 lb. package of bacon.
As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk
standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier.
While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated,"You
must be single."
The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the
derelict's
intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt
and saw nothing
particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk
to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said "Well, you
know what, you're absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?"
The drunk replied, "Cause you're uglier than [censored]"
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 4,149
Hard-core CEG'er
|
|
Hard-core CEG'er
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 4,149 |
Scientist today exhumed beethoven from his grave, when they opened the coffin, they were shocked to see him playing the piano backwards,when asked what this meant a spokesman said he was de-composing.
Sean Connery gets a call from his agent one day. The agent goes "Sean, I've got you a job, starts tomorrow, early. You'll have to be there for 10-ish". Sean furrows his brow and says "Tennish? but I don't even have a racket."
A little girl goes to the barber shop with her father. She stands next to the barber chair, eating a cake while her dad gets his haircut. The barber smiles at her and says, "Sweetheart, you're gonna get hair on your muffin"
"I know," she replies. "I'm gonna get t!ts too."
-- 1999 SVT #220 --
In retrospect, it was all downhill from here. RIP, CEG.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 1,939
Hard-core CEG'er
|
|
Hard-core CEG'er
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 1,939 |
3 Irish men walk past a bar......
It could happen.
2000 Silver Frost SVT
# 1637/2150
D.O.B. 01/14/2000
|
|
|
|
|
