Brex: I'll answer your questions the best that I can...one at a time.
"What exactly is heat soak?"
Heat soak is the effect that engine heat has on the incoming air that comes through the air filter. [Hot air doesn't work as well as cool air for making power.] It occurs predominantly while driving during warm weather in stop and go traffic (something that's very common where I live). It can be more pronounced when the humidity is high. Having the A/C running can also make it worse (the radiator cooling fans are running all the time that the A/C is turned on).
"Someone said that the cone style is pointless???"
That's a matter of opinion. There is a dyno test on the Capitol CEG website that details their test of the stock airbox vs. the SVT airbox vs. the KKM filter on the same car. Each airbox change 'up the ladder' provided a measurable increase in torque and horsepower at the driving wheels.
" Do you need a new aftermarket flow meter if you go with the cone filter?"
No. Any modification to your engine (including intake and exhaust) requires a reset to your engine computer (pull fuses #4, #11 as stated in my last post).
I hope this is a little easier to understand.
My car is my daily driver. I look at modifications carefully, so that I can maintain good driveability and reliability. I have done similar modifications to the airboxes on my last three cars with the only "consequence" being more noise. [just a few more of my "two cents" pieces

]
Mike