Contour Enthusiasts Group Archives Forums Branches Southwest Hey D, sumpin' you might wanna see...

I don't know how often you get over to the Off-Topic board, but if you haven't been lately, you might wanna check out a little thread called "Dropping bombs on the Taliban". Better be wearing shorts in there, it gets pretty hot. I'll let that thread do the rest of the talking.

Well, now that you've found my hidden message, it's probably a safe bet that I've got other messages sitting around somewhere...

I left you and your compadre a love letter over there.
Lots O' Love.

Hehe, that's a nice idea, but seriously, he's already done enough damage to himself. His need to be right is so great, he went back on his own word and "stooped down to my level" just to get one more last word in! Absolutely pathetic! From here on out, everytime he opens his mouth, he's just saving me the trouble. I don't have to do anything; he's destroying himself.

Anyhow, I'm not bringing that to this proud forum -- my job here is to troll, and I've been slacking in that department lately, so...



There....much better.

I actually wrote this a few days ago, but my internet connection has been on hiatus. I believe, however, that sattire deserves its chance, regardless of age. With that said...

Are you tired of feeling guilty about something? Have you had it with not knowing why things are the way they are? Exasperated with having to be a responsible adult? If so, then you're ready for “Blame It On Clinton”, a brand-new, one-day course that you can take right in the comfort of your own home. In just 24 hours, you'll be blaming everything on former President Clinton. From school shootings to getting shortchanged, JFK's assassination to running out of toilet paper, it's all Clinton's fault! Think of how much easier your own personal life will be when you “Blame It On Clinton”. Are your kids watching too much trash on TV? Don't worry about what your kids watch, just “Blame It On Clinton”! Don't want to have to explain to your spouse where that rouge hickey came from? Just “Blame It On Clinton”! You'll never have to take responsibility for anything ever again! To get this wonderful course, just send a check or money order for $68,000 to SVT Contour, 123 Apathy Way, San Diego CA, 91025. Why does it cost so much? Hey, don't blame us, “Blame It On Clinton”!

DISCLAIMER: The above is in no way meant to be taken seriously. It is pure sattire, and if you take it any other way, especially after reading this paragraph, it's your own damn fault.